my hamstrings are always tight.

is it winter?

for anybody else who may have spent many years forgetting they had a body, tight hamstrings make running difficult. they shorten my stride. which then leads to my knee pain. and even some upper-back pain, because i get anxious.

the most surprisingly useful thing i learned... about 9 months in to running... was how to keep my entire body relaxed while running. for any length of time. i guess that isn't a "surprisingly useful thing." i mean that i didn't realize i was holding myself so tightly while i ran, and how much energy that tension consumed.

my runs are much better since then.

but, i must get back to my tight hamstrings. and then work. and then run. and then?

*

writing.

i seem to run better than i write. lately.

this always happens to me at the beginning of a NEW writing period. i spend more time thinking. not necessarily about writing, but, it turns out that i'm really always thinking about writing, i just pretend not to be. even to myself.

*

should i apply to PhD programs?

i just. don't want to be that poor again. eh.

hamstrings.

o.

and music.

i have a big smile on my face about music.